choose to trust.

church today was just amazing for me. i've always had trust issues & today was really eye opening to the chains that have been binding me on this issue. here is the sermon we watched today at church & it was much needed not only for me but everyone! we could always use reinforcement on how important trust is in relationships.

i always knew i had trust issues, but this really put it into perspective for me. it is my choice whether to have trust issues or not. & it comes down to my choice to change it. same goes for you. it is your choice to change whether you are going to choose to trust.

the whole purpose of the life apps sermon series at Journey is to apply these vital sermons to our lives. that being said, i am excited to apply the things i've learned over the past few weeks to my life. especially this because i've had such a struggle with trust. trusting friends, guys, family even. & like Andy says in this sermon, everyone says they have someone that is the exception to the rule to this trusting application. no. did the Lord have an exception of people he chose not to love? & we should strive to be like Christ; therefore, trust.

i just think this sermon is great & if you have about 30 minutes just watch it. it's really great & has lots of tips on how to trust&love how the Lord tells us to.

in His Love--

who we become.

so, it took me 2 whole months to read the book captivating. what's the reason it took me so long you ask? because i learned so much from this book. sometimes i would read a page a day & just reread it because i wanted to take in everything it had to say. however, i know i do not remember every single line out of that book. i did highlight many parts & look upon them often to remember certain areas that i may struggle with. i have to say that it is a book every woman should read. this book came at a very great time for me as well. the Lord placed this as my first book to read after Christmas because He knew what i was going to endure.

i have grown up with the feelings of not being good enough for a lot of people, my family, boys, friends even. i wrestle with those thoughts&feelings every day. the only person who needs to validate my beauty and worth is the Lord. no one else. not friends, not boys, not family. & that should be enough for all of us. we shouldn't need the attention of a million people to validate what we do, say, feel, look like; we shouldn't need people to validate who we are or who we become.

today, my prayer is that you and i keep our eyes fixed on this fact: the Lord is enough for us. the Lord will provide everything we need.

no family, no relationship, & no friend can do that.

in His Love--

loves in life.

being alone really makes you find out what your loves in life are.

i'm finding those things out little by little.

it's almost time to act upon a few as well.

adventure&risk,

here i come.

& living it to the fullest.

freedom.

here it is, February, & everyone is basking in the sunshine outside. caa-razy. but, also really great. i love this kind of weather. not too hot, not too cold, & beautiful to be outside, reading, pondering with a cup of coffee & being in the company of my best friends [duh, Jesus & my dog].

so, it's been like 3 weeks since i posted. what's been on my mind you say? well, a lot actually.

a ton.

however, the Lord has brought me Peace in that because every time my mind starts to wander off in la-la-land or to thoughts that are worry some, He brings me back to Him. He focuses my thoughts on that which is eternal. He has taught me a lot in the place that i am in right now. He has taught me to take compliments with more thanks than bitterness. if any of you know me, i am the worlds WORST at taking compliments. i will steer away from any compliment anyone gives me. He has taught me to embrace who i am even when perfection seems to get the best of me. i will not please everyone, but i strive to be more like Him every day with my life. i will fail others at times, & i will continue to be human & sin every day of my life; but that is no reason to intentionally act like a crazy person & do whatever the heck i want. He has taught me to embrace my true&genuine heart. in James 5:16 it says, "Therefore confess your sins to each other & pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful & effective." with confessing your sin comes freedom. freedom in who you are, freedom in who has died for you, freedom of who has paid that debt for you. & with that comes thankfulness & righteousness. i want other people to be open & honest with me because i want prayer to revolutionize me, our generation, & in turn the world.

when i rang in the new year with one of my best friends, we made prayer walls. this was our promise for 2012 to make it a year to completely revamp ourselves into prayer warriors. the Lord has been revamping my prayer life in so many ways. i have probably spent more time in prayer this past month than i have my total life. i know crazy right! but, i have found out so much about myself & God as well. prayer is a form of worship & it's totally not about me at all. worship is ALL ABOUT THE LORD. it is for HIS Glory, HIS Praise, & HIS Pleasure.

i'm so thankful to learn new things every day about my eternal Savior & the Life he has planned for me. a life called for His Pleasure.

In His Love.

Amy.

figure out.

sometimes when i have so many thoughts in my head to try to figure out everything in my life at the moment & for the future, i just go outside to pray & read.

it's a huge breath of fresh air to add some Jesus to the stuffiness of my flesh-like brain.

forever grateful.

'hale'

so many times i have begun a blog post & not posted it or simply deleted it. don't ask me why because i cannot give you an answer.

so many things have been on my mind & have happened since i last posted. to make a long story short, i have quit my job, moved back home, & have two jobs. this life isn't the one i planned for myself when i graduated from college, but isn't that what happens when you make a plan for yourself? God shows you just how out of control you are with your life! just when i thought i knew exactly what i wanted to do with my life, i had NO idea. i mean NO idea. i am really slowing down to realize what the Lord wants for my life. i am taking a breather to figure out what it really is that He wants from me. do i know how i am going to figure that out? no, but i think trying to jump into things myself isn't helping. i love my jobs & the people i work with. it's fun & they are so compassionate & willing to work with me around the fact that i have two jobs.

it's been a crazy transition from college to the working world, but i have realized that we all have to move on & i have to move on sooner than my younger friends, obviously! haha so, i will simply just visit them & remember the great memories i had. i'm meeting new people & really having a great time with life. i learn new things about myself & about life every day. i began to volunteer at a local church & joined a small group which is really great. the pastor of the church is actually my small group leader & we are diving into Luke as we go into the Christmas season. we have challenged ourselves to really dive into the Word more. we thought Luke would be a great place to start because it's the reason for the season :]

i want to challenge myself to read the Word more. i'm definitely not in the Word enough. i want to challenge myself to pray more. sometimes i rely too much on my ADD thoughts of when i remember certain things to stop & pray, however, i really want to stop & have a certain time of prayer during the day like right when i wake up or a certain time where i am simply praying about all of those things. i am being challenged right now to have a servants heart in EVERYTHING that i do. all the times i am frustrated because i don't have a job that gives me the schedule i necessarily want or whatever it is i WANT, i need to remember, i am doing the Lord's work, not what i WANT. however, i know the Lord will show me His passion for my life & it will be my passion as well. [[something i have learned from reading --> Holiness means wholeness which comes from the root word 'hale' meaning hearty, healthy, & fulfilled.]] Therefore, my life will be filled with holy work for the world which will leave me fulfilled whether i feel like it is my desire at the time or not. i choose NOT to make up my mind of what happiness will be for my life.

sometimes i get so frustrated at how i think WAY TOO MUCH. i feel like my mind is on 24/7 about EVERYTHING. & it can be so exhausting. i want my mind to just lay in the peace Jesus gives me. i have to continually remind myself that i need to back off & let God reign.

i have been struggling with the shame at the fact i don't have a 'great' job where i'm using my degree & doing what i necessarily "want" to do. but, i am SO humbled by the fact that the Lord delivers grace to me every day for that. i am so THANKFUL that he is delivering me from that & showing me so many great things about the jobs i do have. i love my jobs & i wouldn't take anything for them or the people that i am meeting. however, i'm having a hard time believing that people can't find jobs out there because maybe you don't have the job you "want" but you can find a job! i have people coming to me to try to give me a job now!

right now i work at chick-fil-a full time & bath & body works seasonally maybe becoming a part time job after the Christmas is over. if not, then possibly getting another job with another company. chick-fil-a really makes my day, i have the most hilarious experiences & conversations with people & get to play with babies, and clean tables & refill drinks, but that's besides the point! just kidding! however, i'm more than excited to move behind the counter next week. experiences i've had have gone from bad & embarassing like calling a lady a 'sir' [[oops!]] to hilarious like a man asking if i'm getting a rock for Christmas [[H NO.]] to flattering saying i am beautiful & so sweet to a little weird to where customers only will let me refill their drinks [[& even tell the others working the dining room they are waiting on me to come back around to get what they need]]. bath & body has been a lot of fun too! i get a 30% discount at VS too! :]] that makes me uber happy!

so, some ask why i am getting all of these jobs. well, i want to save money to go back to school. so why not work my butt off now & get some money saved so when i know what i want to do i don't have to work really hard to pay for it & really make good grades & focus on what i need to focus on?

well, that's all that's on my mind right now. i'm sure there is a lot more that i have left out. but, you can read that another day :] thanks lovely followers. i'm blessed that you read this. [[i was going to do a little game & put a crazy word in the middle of my post & have my followers text it to me to see who reads hah!]]

In His Love--

everything.

Let everything I do or say be done with overwhelming love.

Because everything I do or say is for the glory of God.

Lord, let this be my life motto. Always remind me of how significant you made me to be in this life for others. Don't let the shadow of the world blind me with Your AMAZING plan for me. Show me, lead me, & guide me. Let everything I do make me become more like You.